01 April 2010

Insular Idiocy -or- Washington remains a cesspool of intellectual mediocrity

bdunbar | Go Navy

Ladies and Gentleman: Congressman Hank Johnson (D-GA) articulating (for some values of 'articulate') his concern that the island of Guam will "actually tip-over and capsize."
How in the name of Neptune's nipples does this clown think islands work?


  1. How in the name of Neptune's nipples does this clown think islands work?

    However his mind works ... it's a place where islands aren't the tops of hills poking out of water but .. flat bits of stuff that float like a raft on a lake. God above only knows how he imagines they stay put without floating around.

    Too bad this isn't true. It would have saved the Marines a lot of work in World War II. Just gather a few thousand Marines on one side of an island, everyone heave-hos and whoops-a-daisy Tarawa turns turtle and you've cleared the island without a lot of tedious grenade throwing and gratuitous gunfire.

    And this guy is a lawyer and was a judge for a few years. And a proud graduate of Our Public Schools.

  2. everyone heave-hos and whoops-a-daisy Tarawa turns turtle

    Hahahaha! I love it.

    Why even bother sending the Marines to Tarawa when you could just hook a tug boat onto the island and bring it to you?

  3. On his site he claims that it is "subtle humor" and "obviously metaphorical".


    It's a qualitative call, but he doesn't seem particularly ironic to me

  4. Thanks for bringing that to my attention, but I'm not buying his explanation.

  5. I've also heard that Johnson's Hep-C infection is responsible for this ... lapse, but if that disease is causing such cognitive impairment that he thinks islands capsize then perhaps he should recuse himself from sitting in congress until such a time as he regains mastery of basic geography.

  6. I guess this highly educated (?)lawyer-judge-congressman must believe that all the islands of Hawaii will one day be tipped over by a monster whale and sink deep into the deep blue Pacific Ocean???

  7. he's taken you all for an April Fools' ride ...

  8. I wish it were so, really.

    Even if it were though he missed the mark by a day: that hearing was on 31 Mar.